How Stoicism and I Failed Each Other

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How Stoicism and I Failed Each Other

It was a Monday morning—because, of course only Mondays are capable of inspiring unwanted (evident only in hindsight) philosophical reflections before breakfast. I was sipping my tea, flipping through a book on Stoicism, when a line struck me like a divine revelation:

"Who then is invincible? The one who cannot be upset by anything outside their reasoned choice."

Aha! Enlightenment.

I grabbed a sticky note, wrote it down, underlined it twice (because once didn’t feel wise enough), and leaned back, feeling power in my newfound imperturbability. From this moment onward, I would be untouchable.  I felt more like Frank Underwood whispering to himself, "From this moment on, you are a rock. You absorb nothing, you say nothing, and nothing breaks you."

Armed with my Stoic wisdom, I walked into the office, nodding sagely at colleagues, impervious to the usual morning grumbles. The coffee was tasteless? Not in my control. Printer not working? Not in my control.

Then came a meeting with the district officials. I presented a dataset, delivered my points smoothly, and even allowed myself a moment of self-congratulation. Look at me, completely unbothered, fully Stoic!

And then it happened.

My subordinate shuffled in. We exchanged pleasantries. Then, mid-discussion, I noticed something odd. A discrepancy. My dataset, which I had so confidently presented, was wrong.

He had conveniently left out crucial information, and I had unwittingly just delivered a masterpiece of misinformation.

The sticky note with my Stoic mantra still sat on my desk. I glanced at it. It glanced back at me.

"Who then is invincible....

I crumpled it into a ball and hurled it into distant corner dustbin.

What followed was the reason I am writing the post.

For thirty minutes, I delivered a masterclass in accountability—papers trembled, the AC labored under stress, and even the WiFi stood at attention.

When I was done, the silence was deafening. A bird outside the window stopped mid-chirp. Somewhere in the distance, a stapler clicked in surrender. I sat back, breathless, my Stoic dreams reduced to ashes.

That's part 1 and how I failed the stoicism!

But then magic happened.

By lunchtime, inefficiency in the office vanished. Miraculously, all those who had been “too sick” to complete their work made a full recovery. People who once took three days to file a simple report were now producing polished documents in record time. My subordinates transformed into productivity machines, delivering outcomes like seasoned professionals.

And that is how Stoicism failed me.

Balance has been restored. We are even now. :)